What You Hear...See...Touch...Read...Love.....ALL OF IT!

  I don't know the date, it is in January, and maybe it is a Friday.
  It importance to me, is minimal, retire benefit.
  I sit here knowing that there is a new president being sworn in office today. The TV is on mute, but out of respect for our country, history happens and the TV is on in the next room. So if I walk by, I will see things, you see I have to be careful.
  What I see, hear,k touch, read, love stays with me, like a giant sponge. So I walk carefully and with direction. Purpose and knowing what I can and can't handle. Maybe grief does that to you, breaks you down. All I know for sure, is that only good is going in my brain, beautiful words, pictures, people, stuff!! Don't get me wrong, I do not close my eyes or heart to the horrors of the world, or people in need. I just know, in order to be a better person, I have to take care of myself, so I can serve others.
 This little long intro, probably only makes sense to me, but heck, I write a personal blog, for myself. You the reader, I hope can enjoy or learn a little something, but first I have to be true to me.
 Pleasing the multitudes is not going to happen, so spill out my insides, I will. It heals me, first.

Now to keep me busy, and my nausea at bay.( broken heart about election, but I will live)
   This last week, I babysat for my child (OK, Hart and Nicole's child)
    My first grandchild within hollering distance ( almost!)
  I thought about for days, about what I would sing to him. Explaining to my husband, that yes this is very important. ( Bill, hubs, kept telling me the baby is two weeks old!!)
  I explained that you have to start them off hearing good things!! I cannot go right into "Jesus Christ Superstar Cast Album!" or "Rent." I need Joni Mitchell, Neil Young, Dylan, something soft and beautiful. So I printed out some lyrics, so as not to mess up, got my cds in order and I was ready. You would never know from my strong Alto Frog voice, that I can not sing. Because my presentation is, spot on! Utter Joy fills my voice with tenderness and off key, pure folk songs to start off with loving music. ( Note...the first day, I stuck with Christmas Carols, so I had to step up my game)

Perfect music, for perfect baby.

Up next, I will surprise you, however I have Rosemary Clooney on right now, and I am sounding pretty good!!!

So this day has begun, my dog, Lucy the lab, is on the floor beside me, had MAJOR surgery this week, and now I baby sit her. Big mass removed, big incision, hard to walk an 85 lb baby!! Ringling Brothers Circus may be closing their tent, but the Baron Circus is in business 24/7.

I call my parents every day, to check on medication, food, how they feel. Last week I called, and I only talk to mom, once in a blue moon to dad. Mom was saying all was pretty good, she was weak as a kitten, and dad...." wait he is trying to tell you something ( he yells things to her, to tell me)..." He wants me to tell you that we are both clean as a whistle, BALLS and ALL!"

Thank you Homer ( daddy) for always making me laugh, and for teaching me to always be clean. Apparently in all areas!!

So on this special day, of our new president, be clean, listen to good music, sing loud, ( we will not be silent) read good books, love each other, and write it all down!!!

Wing It

  I have been busy writing blogs, in my head, and scribbled on pads. Pieces and pieces of beautiful thoughts, words and deeds have passed through me, and lets see what I can gather together.
    These are all my titles
           Galaxy Snatch and The Lagoon of Mystery-Carrie Fisher
           Pure Precious-southern people
           Jesus is enough, he calls me every morning-little lady I saw on web
           Wing It-some ditty I saw on Pinterest
           I love Joe Biden and President Obama-me!!
These thoughts have run amok inside my brain of advanced years.
    Along with how much I love my friends, and ON TOP of that list, we have a new Baron Boy Baby!! Yes Uma Thurman, has a new baby, Wyatt Heyward Baron. AND he lives near me, my first local grand!! He is just over a week old, and more perfect with each day. ( I am not kidding)
I have been surprised with such JOY, I have been reflective as well. I miss Ward, I want him to know this happiness with us. I remember holding my first grand Adrian, and feeling such love, never wanting to put him down, and telling him our family stories in the early hours, rocking and singing.
  I was holding Wyatt yesterday, and when Hart came back from errands, he said, " Did you put him down?" I smiled, " Absolutely not, we were talking, and singing."
 I thought about my second G-kid, Finn and how I did not hold him as much, probably due to grieving over Ward, who knows? Maybe just the second one, we all were busy with Adrian.
 Life is so Pure and Precious!!
   I miss Carrie Fisher, I miss her wit and brilliant star. Her writing, so raw and uncovered about her mental illness, helped me look at Wards illness, with a little more kindness. Any mental disorders, need to be looked at with respect and kindness, we all have something!!! She made me, laugh at something that is extremely hard to laugh at. Any one that can refer to her lady parts, as Galaxy Snatch and The Lagoon of Mystery, is a friend of mine. Through in some Bi-polar and there is Love overflowing. I will miss her, damn it!! Her mom missed her too, so she checked out, dropped the mike, bye-bye, not living on earth without this joy!!
 On Winging It:
    To be honest,
    I'm just winging it.
    Life, Motherhood,
    My eyeliner!  Don't know who said this, but I think all women feel like this each day, and that is enough. Wisdom for the masses.
   The little 90 year old lady, that thinks that god is calling her to prayer each morning, I saw on TV. Maybe it was the News or Hollywood show? I think they may be one and the same!! She was so loving, said "Jesus is enough" and calls her!! I thought, OK, my prayers need some work. I want him or her to call me!!! I want to feel, what this lady is feeling, " Jesus is enough"
   If you pay attention, all this love, comes to you.
   My president leaves soon, and I will be sad but my thankfulness for having him be in my life for eight years, my cup is full! So, on bending knee, grateful for him and Joe.
   I think that covers most of my thought process, I did read two books, that I would like for you to check out. The Storied Life of A.J FiKry, by Gabrielle Zevin ( thank you Perlotta)
     and Everything We Keep by Kerry Lonsdale. I think they are books for women, but that is for you to decide. Reading Books for Living by Will Schwalbe. I see it as a book for all, amazing. Three books in a row, that are delicious. OH I forgot, I read Carrie FIshers new book, The Princess Diaries also, maybe last week!! If you love Star Wars, you will enjoy, but not like her typical books.

Again, take a minute to write down, all the good, and you will see......Amazing things happen

I did notice many capital letters in the middle of words, and all over the place!! It makes me happy, just WING IT!

   

    

Not Everyday BUT........

   Happy New Year of possibilities.
   What goes up must come down, spinning wheels round and round, I am so trying to put a positive spin on things.
    Yesterday while watching the Rose Bowl, I decided that not everyday BUT....most days, I would like to ride on a float!! Yes, ride in the Rose Bowl Parade, at least once a week. Any float, just waving and smiling among the flowers!! Add that to my wish list, some call it Bucket list, Dreams, Vision Board, ( I love capital letters) RIDE ON A FLOAT, goes near the top. Another thing I have decided, in this year of positive thinking, I would like to also make a float in the Rose Bowl Parade. Sit for hours, glue gun in hand, putting on petal after petal, bean after bean. I think that would be like flower mediation. Cutting roses and sticking them in Styrofoam, I just get giddy thinking about it!! Maybe I will not use the glue gun, just some special glue that would not burn me, yes they must have special fairy glue!! Marigold after Marigold, Aster after Aster, Lilies and Calla Lilies, tree bark, and coffee beans, all of this fascinates me!! Its going on my list, I think these people, the glue people, are all volunteers, that is do-able !!!! Not everyday but....
  I also want to wash an elephant, our zoo teaches you how to do that, its always in summer, maybe they could bathe in the morning before I begin to wilt!! I want to touch and commune with an elephant. On the list.

  I would like to go see a friend in Montana, that is going to happen. Sue and I need a visit, Deb, after the snow. My horse whisperer skills will come in handy, I just want to see you (of course) and the area.
 I would also like to sit for hours in the Tuileries Gardens in Paris, by the big fountain, near the Louvre. On a sunny day, reading a book, with not a care in the world. I love this spot. The hubs and I sat there many times in a day, chilly and busy with life all around us. It is magic, I want to go back. On my to do list, which I would like to do daily!!

Hold a baby for a little while each day. They have a volunteer program in some of our hospitals, a granny program, to hold babies that have to stay in the hospital for so long. Long after the parents have to go home, and rest. I think holding a baby, may be the best thing in the world. Something to look into.

I would like to paint all day, everyday but the hum of the house calls me. But...that is my goal, to just paint, in a studio with the perfect light, with no washer or dryer noise , no telephones, silence, letting the colors speak. Working on that one.

I read about three books every two weeks, so I just want that to continue. So I wish for writers near and far, to write and write some more. I miss Pat Conroy( just thinking out loud)

I have everything that I want and need, but always have more plans.....Keep moving and loving, and caring for people. Occasionally, just a float, to keep me sweet!!
    Happy New Year, Dream Big!!
          -B-