26 Hours of Labor, A Labor of Love

   I bet if I looked back at my blogs on, or around this date, I would see a similar vein running through.
   There would be many "birthing baby" stories, since two of my boys, came out of my belly! The only one I like to mention each year is the nurse who told me, " I would rather you NOT BREATHE, then to breathe like you are doing!" OB nurses should have the patience of Job, and this one was lacking some sweetness. I had many shifts of nurses, so I cant complain but.....I will, this one was mean, and I still hear her loud and crass voice.
 If you are a guessing person, you have already decided I am outside in this glorious sunshine. The August day is lovely, with a cool hushed breeze blowing and me, writing my blog in longhand, because I need to "store-up" this joy juice. ( I just deleted an entire blog, so I am starting again!! Damn it!)
 The warm sunshine is my lifeline and I will hang on tight. The burbs are quiet, not a leaf blower around, so I will ease on into this stillness. We are our own home, we are the first occupant, be still and know.
    Yesterday was my son's 34th birthday, his name is Ward.
     Usually I relive each second of the 26 hour labor game, but yesterday, I was stuck in thinking about what he was missing. I felt a tightness in my body and my mind was adrift, it was not a good place to linger.
My other wonderful children called to check on me, and remind me of Ward's ways! I had to turn my thinking around, so I had a talk with myself about his being with us every day. I don't think he misses a thing, often I think I see him, smell him or know that he is near. I just don't want him to be sad, or I will be sad, and grief wins! I know he enjoys The Baron Family comings and goings. I think he is so proud of all of us, as we are of his brief life. He lived to be 100 in those 25 years, and we celebrate its fullness.
  So on this birthday, my darling boy, this is your present from me.
        To live in this day
        Use it well,
        Remind others of your life of purpose and joy,
       and continue to love you so so so much
                    Mom
       I think you are standing right behind me, remember the movie Ghost? Can you touch me? move my cell phone? Its OK, I know you are near. Happy Birthday Ward.