You Are Going To Need A Bigger Boat

    Each and all Saturdays, I repeat this phrase, "You are going to need a bigger boat!" from the horror movie, Jaws.
    My life is big and full, and all my joints ache! ( what is this process our bodies go through, where we begin to make noise with each movement!) ( and you know I am tracking each step!)
    August is the month I had my babies, and its my birthday, and its wicked hot. August is my happy place.
    My Hart, who is my heart, celebrates his 30th birthday next week. August is a time of reflection of thirty years with this big boy. I think he was 97 percent perfect, and that is all I will say! (not true!)
   I often would wake him up, because he loved to sleep, and I wanted to look at him more!
   His laughter is hysterical, no in-between. He makes me laugh, still.
   I love you Hartley Baron, more than The Beatles. 8-21-84)
   My Ward would have been 33 (8-26-81) this summer. Of course I think about what he has missed, but I concentrate on what he left us. The stories are endless......he was a character. He was a genius, that went to the edge. When I delivered him, via c-section and 26 hrs of labor,  I thought, " Oh God, I love him way too much!" It was a miracle, this having babies, and him being my first, I was insane with love! I held him for two years in a row, and maybe more!! I wish I could hold him right now, and in a way, I can. I love you more each day Ward. You were a gift to us, that we unwrap on the hour. Happy Birthday.
  Then there was Emma, born 9-18-88, but came to us 8-4-89 on a plane from India. So she came into our family also in this glorious month of August. A wisp of a child, very frail and sick, but I knew she was ours. I looked into her charcoal eyes and said, " Your are home." I had my girl, who turned into the star that she is today. Happy Adoption day Emma Lea.
  The August babies were added to two stepsons, whom I met in August. While attending a weekend course at Princeton, in Echocardiography, I met Bill Baron, and Keith age 7, and Brian age 6. Now you see why I have repeated for many Saturdays I NEED A BIGGER BOAT! Now Keith is 41 and Brian 40, they went on this marriage journey with me, and we started a family together. They are mine, with every beat of my heart.
    This Saturday is no different, the waves of crazy busy are high and I struggle to get over them. I do it with joy. Small victories around each corner, and a heart full of love.
    August, you have charmed me, for yet another year.