Restart, Do Over, Yikes....Stay Focused Bon

    So much goes on in the ADD brain of mine, I have to hit rewind, restart, do over, several times a minute, hour, day. ( no HD, never hyper, just scattered)
    So I have told you about this Global History Course, that is wonderful but time consuming. Well, I may be part of the problem, which is OK! Dr. B and I were on the second lecture this morn, and I just zoned out, this is what I was thinking.
                 a. I smell really good, I love to smell clean (sniffing my arms)
                 b. Hope Marina Scott is OK in California, those fires are so horrible
                 c. Ward has missed so much, I hate that.
I then heard China transformation, Shit birds!! I will have to start over, I have heard nothing.
Go back, first thought, after I take notes and write the years 1368 to 1644, Teacher man's shirt looks crisp today!!! OK..... am back, Did you know that the planting of Mulberry trees, and Chinese irrigation systems, caused the elephant population in southern China to go extinct? I think the trees were for the silk worms, its all interwoven, and after the elephants left, population exploded!! Needed more people in the fields. I love history, we are also on the medical branch of this history course. Science and Medicine for each period, extra!! I love Extra!! ( I had to take some time off, to wash clothes and blog! Duh!!) ( I will not suffer alone, you are going with me!!)
     Reason for blog, I woke up feeling so wonderful. Seriously thrilled to the bone to be alive, and as I hung my legs over the side of the bed. I pondered why? this feeling of excitement.
    Oh yes, my dream. I had the opportunity to visit with an old friend last night. Ever so briefly, or long, its hard to say in a dream, but we got to see each other after about 47 years or so. I have thought of him, over the years, wondering the "If's" of his life. Last I talked to him, I had just had Ward, and he was laughing at how much I loved Sesame Street. He was on his way to some Arabic country to work, he was a pediatric cardiologist. I never figured out the why, he was going. He had been in the Carolinas for a long time. I screamed when he told me he was leaving the States, I like to know where my people are, at all times. That was just too far away, and he mentioned something about his kids were grown and did not need him anymore?? I told him that was not true, and he told me that was the new mother in me talking. It was a short, phone conversation that said much, and left much unsaid. Dr. R.D. Jackson, is my friend, mentor, love and buddy, I don't know what happened to him, the rare bird that he was. When I was in the cath lab, he was one of my bosses, and cantankerous to work with. I was the only one, that could deal with him, and it became my job and my privilege.
I adored him, and got to see him last night, and visit. It was great, I think we both looked young, we were not the old people of today. But the years had gone by, because we had so much to talk about, and then we were quiet. Sometimes, words are not needed, even in a dream. I wish that I could have a redo dream. Rewind, go back, visit him again. I wish I could explain this feeling in my heart, for this person. I think he knew, he gave me a ceramic toad one day, to apologize for acting ugly in the lab. I told him, while we were both scrubbed in, whispering through my mask!! " You are crazy if you think this frog is going to make me forget you are an asshole today!!" I could see his smile, though his super thick black glasses. He was one of my most favorite people, and I miss him. So thankful for my dream, he seemed good, it just was not enough time. I guess it is never enough time.
Sitting and talking with Dr. Jackson, or trying to concentrate on Ming dynasty, sometimes you just have to hit pause, and restart.
Stay focused Bon 

Photos-my head is always in the clouds, and its wonderful!!