You Better Sit Down

   In my house, in every room, there are couches or multiple soft chairs to sit in. In my young, 64 years, I have needed to sit down!! ( or fall out in the prone position)
   Humans need places to, sit a spell, shell peas ( never again), visit and more important read and be quiet.
   One of my DIL asked me once, "Why do you have a chair in the bathroom?"
    Which I find to be an odd question. I replied, " One day you will know. You will need to find a space, even if its in the bathroom! to think, vomit, or read movie magazines."
    You may think, where are you going Bon-Bon?
    Well we are getting new furniture for my birthday, so I have to shift all other rooms. One big couch, that I like to call the animal couch and my winter nap couch, went to Goodwill. It needed to go, but the dog and I are not happy. ( Husband said I get too attached to stuff!) ( hogwash)
     Ward's room got a little love seat, put in it, to make his room feel more complete. Visitors will be happy and I think Ward will be happy, since he slept on the couch in his room for most of his life.
( he even painted a picture of his couch, that hangs on his wall, to this day)
     I have a couch in our bedroom, that has been the cat, Lainey's, lair for years. Her safe hiding spot, from the world. It is 27 years old, and it needs to go, but .......
     The couch going to our bedroom is new-er-er and will work well in there, and is making room for the new den furniture, but......Lainey can not get under it. ( Hubs says, "SHE has places all over upstairs to hid, if needed) ( Well, we could get that couch recovered, so she could just have an updated pad!) ( Bill keeps talking....well were would the green couch go??) and I replied out of parenthesis...into the computer room for the dog and I to nap on!!
     I have written many blogs about my loving my stuff, worn, torn, used UP and loved. New things take some getting use to, probably why I like antiques so much.
     I just need comfort and cuteness, and never for someone to tell me, You Better Sit Down!!
    People, never lead with that phrase, it just prolongs the news. Usually bad news. Fix me a cup of coffee, small talk a little, and then BAM, give me the news. I will find a place to fall, I have furniture all over the place!!! ( and many altars to pray!! I am well equipped for my knees hitting the floor, and hollering for Jesus)
        Now to close out July, can you even believe it? Summer has felt heavy to me, with all the rain, but like I have mentioned, my yard has been happy.
       Some dots to connect. I still am reading Ernest Hemingway bio. Slow reading, but I just love reading about flawed characters. People fascinate me, all people, but writers especially. I guess I should say artists. I have eight books on the Kindle, waiting, so I will get back to you.
      Things I have learned from watching cartoons with Wyatt are, Danial Tiger can not replace Mr. Rogers, but he is OK??!! At least the music is the same, and he said something this week that I wrote down. Comparing someones fatigue to "Margaret Tired!" I guess maybe its his baby sister, I half watch things, but I just liked it, I am going to use it forever, "Margaret Tired!" I love it, she may need a couch!
 Also on Sesame Street, someone said, 'Count down to Calm down" another pearl of wisdom from my Muppet friends, I love Sesame Street.
  Last but not least, Dr. B and I watch many foreign films, and think nothing of closed captions being on. ( drives our kids crazy) ( which I like) As we have aged we leave them on more often, my guess is our hearing may be headed out the door. Who cares, we have captions on!!
   While I was getting dressed  one morning, I clicked onto a show about James Brown, his life.
   Well the captions were on and it was like Home Karaoke, I could sing every song, and got my James Brown ON!! I had the moves, the hacking voice, and the words in front of me, it was the only way to ever "get on up" in the wee hours of each day.( no one can do him better than my brother Benjie, but I was close brother man) I decided at that moment the captions will never go off again, just think what you may miss out on!! Never, I am leaving them on.
    You had better sit down, I will be 65 in a few days, and I can leave them on!
     Its Saturday and beautiful, and crazy wonderful. You can take it to the bank, you can always find a soft place to sit at my house or fall out!! Call it whatever you need to.
     Peace, Love and may you always find a safe place to Land.
NOTE*** Above pictures are not of my furniture, but I would like to add them to the lot!!!!

Unwrapped

   I have ten years of blogging under my belt, so now, some titles seem familiar.
   This tune may have been sung before, but it is worth a repeat.
          Today , as usual, I was talking to my mom, texting, ( is that talking?) (yes) about grandchildren. The sorrows and the joys, and I told her, "Lets just talk about the Joys." She agreed.
I repeated that finding joy was a full time job. She agreed.
          We both went on about our day.
Later after the nail people, so kindly, pampered me. I called Bill and asked if he was still in need of "WHITE OUT" ( don't even ask me why? too long of a story) ( I told him it was last made in the seventies) He told me, that no, he had not gone on the WO search. Trying to spread joy, I told him I would look at the CVS on my way home. ( It was next to nail salon)
       Well, one thing that brings me joy, are drug stores. ( Walgreens is my store, but I was right by CVS) I found some white out pen, so I grabbed it, who uses this mess!! Oh wait, I am buying it!!
Then I took a stroll, and found cotton candy puffs!! a little hard candy, that I almost cried in aisle 3. ( I love the smell and taste of cotton candy) While in the sweet spot, I happen upon UNWRAPPED Starbursts, all red colors. I was tickled pink. Got in my car, and just sat, thinking....Joy is all around you. You do have to look, and be excited. You also have to be grateful for whoever thought of UNWRAPPED Starbursts!! Thank you, no one wants to unwrap individual starburst candy, or anything else. Who was sitting around that table, when that decision came down. I salute you. The wrapping makes noise, and where do you put it, and someone may see that you have opened twenty!! Now you can just grab a handful, and keep walking. AND you don't have to leave the orange, yellow ones!! We all want the red colors, don't we?? Maybe not, but for me, this was an awesome thing.
      Then to know someone, besides me, likes cotton candy!!! and have made it into a hard candy!! Who needs to win the lotto, go to the nearest drug store. You do realize that I am still in my car thinking....... I made it home, hoping that this blog would still be rattling in my brain. It was in bits and pieces, so now I am here.
     Wrap is such a sweet word, to encase, enfold, cover, swathe, swaddle.
     Unwrap is also sweet, shuck, untie, free, husk, peel, uncover.
 I am not a high maintenance lady, more like a smart lady, that is very well taken care of.  I did not take a vow of poverty ever, but I have been poor and rich . I was happy with both. I am a firm believer in taking care of me first, so I can take care of others with the same love and attention.
I believe in being generous, open handed, liberal minded to a fault. ( I think its a plus!!)
I will confess to not wanting to suffer, especially at my young age of almost 65!!
I want my candy unwrapped, my corn shucked, my peas hulled, my nails and toes done!! and as mom and I talked about this subject this morning, we always wear cute clothes!! ( I love my mom)
Is that selfish, no to the hell no! It is taking care of yourself, so that you can lead a life of service to others, and maybe look cute in the process!!
    My mom and I both, lost children, young. We work very hard to be positive, nurturing, loving humans. AND we like to be pampered. Trader Joes sells cut butternut squash pieces, I thank them every time, I go to the store. My DIL told me last week, that I am the biggest tipper she has ever seen. My tip is usually higher then the bill, because these people take care of me, make no money and I want to give back. I have been given much, I have a job to do.
Unwrap some packages for people, by being kind, sharing your story, listening. We are all worthy.
I just heard that today was Friday, so exciting, I thought it was Saturday all day. Now I have an extra day.
   The weather person said today was "sizzling" JOY is all around, 98 degrees on my back porch, and unwrapped Starbursts. Happy girl, signing off. 
   
 

Wake Up

  I have many thoughts about raising children. Some you look back on with dismay and others, you feel great pride in survival. I am a born over thinker, and worrier, so my helicopter skills as a mom were spot on maxed!! I also am a giver and receiver of much love, so that worked out well on any given day with the kids. All of my babies slept in our bed, some more than others. I ended up with very cool children, all of them. I enjoy being around them, they make me laugh. They also have never said, "Yes Mam" or "Yes Sir" or much "Please", southern mambo jumbo, gets on my nerves. You can be polite without a curtsy!! The old south, should have evolved by now, but that is a whole other can of worms. (48% of crazy is out there, I promise)
    Any how, back around to no point, our little new grandson Wyatt spent the night last night. I have been so lucky to have that  little muffin right near me, on this go round.  So this morning with Grandpa got him up, he brought him to bed with me!! He was so excited, the joy energy was jumping off of him! He was looking all around, like what are these people doing with me so early? His head would go left, then right and he was kicking his heels, squealing like a baby pig. I just wanted that moment to stand still, and know that it will not. We kissed and sung, and played, until he forced his Uma, that is me, to get up and going. It just made me think, I  hope I did that with my kids enough, just lay there and enjoy it. Hold them an extra few minutes, skip eating supper at exactly whatever time you are supposed to eat. Leave the laundry and dishes until they are napping, or leave them period. I think as I got older I did more of this, the first ones, you are so trying to get into some rhythm, babies have their own rhythm, you have to learn it. All kids need structure, I do too, but I paint with watercolors, I need freedom of movement. So do children. They need to play, read, swim, scream, throw fits, hate you, love you and for goodness sake crawl into bed with you.
     They will draw on the wall, I promise you, put a frame around it!!
      Kiss them even when they think you have cooties.
     It is not an easy job, but it is your most personal job.
     It is fall on the ground, gut wrenching, painful and if you look more often, it is joy energy jumping off onto you from all angles.
     Wyatt's parents came to get him around noon, and I just thought, Gosh we are so lucky. To wake up to a sweet baby, laughing and cooing, and joyful. WAKE UP, people, we can wake up like that every day, it is up to us, we have that joy still in us!! Buried deep, but it is still there, I just know it.
Wake up tomorrow and say, "What would Wyatt DO??? you will smile, and begin your day with love, hope and laughter. Happy Saturday from hot and humid Atlanta, GA.  It is just a beautiful day in this neighborhood, I know because I watched Daniel Tiger this morning with Wyatt, babies teach us how to find joy, that is a lesson, we should never forget.
Peace and Love
Oh and Happy Birthday, Susan Houser, I am so glad we have been friends for over fifty years. One day I will write a book about us, I promise. The stories are just too fantastic not to share.

Crank Up The Volume

    I have decided after 64 years on this earth, sometimes you just have to crank it up!!
I come to you today, from the Georgia Rain Forest, awaiting the next deluge.
   Only scattered thoughts through this month of July, which means summer is almost over.
   I just got up off the hammock on the back porch, its 90 degrees outside, but you know I love the heat. Our porch is very high in the tree line, so it seems like I am at the lake, or beach, when I retire to the prone position. I grabbed a few electronic devices, pillows and cursed the neighbor next door for using his blower for two hours. NOTE there is nothing to blow! Well, I tuned him out, cranked up the tunes, and begin to read a new bio on Ernest Hemingway, it is soooooo good. Lucy the lab, on the floor below me, and we watched the clouds roll in. I love reading about famous people, who are truly so broken. Either by alcohol, or mental illness, addictions, sometimes all the the mentioned, human can be so complicated,that also makes us interesting creatures. I have always said, about my Ward's illness, that one, I could hang up a shingle and treat people!!! and two, mental illness is very interesting, if it is not your family member. My approach to all things, is research and learn. I have never, not even a day goes by, that I don't try to learn about people and STUFF! Whatever you choose to call, your quirks, or full blown manic attacks. We all know someone who is touched. One day, you will see me, on the steps of The Capital, speaking for the masses. We have to talk about these things, and get on top of this medical situation or lack of care for all people. The crazies in Washington, need to take care of the cray-cray of everyday people. My Ward, came off of our insurance in his middle twenties, and never took his medicine again. He took a lethal dose of  Ketamine and Morphine to get high, or stop the voices, and lost his life. His medication made him a whole person, graduated college, interned at a wonderful commercial advertising co, where he edited commercials, then he lost his insurance and that was that.  Would Hemingway had taken his life, one day, without a gun on his desk? Probably, his family DNA has huge head problems. Would Ward have reached out to street drugs, if he was balanced mentally on his medicine, I like to think not. There is nothing that can done, except to write about it, and hope that people, all people have access to health care. I lost my sister to diabetes, she could not afford her insulin or the damn syringes and she had a little health coverage. All people should have quality health care, I don't understand why people would be against it, but trust me, there is much I do not understand, so I crank up the volume!!!
   Life is difficult, on good days.
   My sweet mama sent me a picture, of four generations of us when Ward was born. It is a darling photo. She asked how I liked it, I said, " I notice all of our skin(, mine, mom, nanny, and of course Wards)! looked like velvet and yet all I can see in my face is fatigue!" Having babies, raising  children, will suck the marrow from your bones. I love my children, but all I could see on my young face was extreme exhaustion. Dog tired, dead on my feet, drained and I would do it all over again in a minute. Thanks mom for sending me the photo, you know I love to get things in the mail. I have that photo somewhere, but you blew it up ( cranked up the volume) and surprised me.
   We went to sweet Joe's memorial on Saturday, and sent him home, with love.
    I wanted to tell one story, but could not buckle my knees to get up, so I will tell you.
    Joe had STUFF, years of STUFF, his brain chemistry was off and on, like so many millions.
    He made a bad choice, and we love him even more, because it is just an accident to not think sometimes.
       Joe and Hart were friends forever. Hart always had a good Joe story to tell me.
       One day he said, " You know Joe never takes a test on test day!" I looked at him, like why?
      " He drives around in his car screaming, until his tonsils are red and raw, and goes to the clinic, for an extra couple of days with note, to study"  I screamed," Hart he is a genius, who would ever think like that?"  Now of course we think, wonder why he just didn't study on the time he had, it just wasn't in his makeup. There are no answers to all our questions, Joe cranked it up, when he needed to, that is pure genius!!! Hemingway left us with chunks of himself on the written page, that may have shortened his life, he ran with the bulls!! Beyond cranking it up!! My Ward, was gentle and eccentric
and his volume was ever changing.
   Life is to be lived, love hard and long, and when it gets too heavy, crank it up!! with something good, and pure and serving others.
    And say you are sorry, every other second if you need to. We are all a little off center, and that is the JOY!