You May Say I'm A Dreamer, But I'm Not The Only One- JL

   Imagine living for today.
   He was such a writer, maybe a magical mystery man. John Lennon, thank you for leaving us your words and melodies. AND my blog title.
         I had to look through three notebooks to find this one dream I wanted to share with you.
         To wake with the feeling, that you may have met someone holy, is pretty cool and a tad crazy.
          Early last week, I woke drenched in sweat, and the menopause days, are long gone. I felt like I had been somewhere in the night.
          This is as much of the dream sequence that I could recall, its enough.
          I had to see a new shrink, not that I need a new one?! but somehow, I was headed to meet him, or her? The waiting room was filled with children, I was the only adult. I thought, this must be a huge mistake, or all the adults are in session and left these kids out here to drive me kooky! I waited and it was hot, and I felt the germs on everything, when this petite, dread locked, Indian Man dressed in a loin cloth and Sari called my name. I rolled my eyes back so far, I thought they would stick, but I followed. He opened the door to brightness and a courtyard that was crawling with people, the colors were exploding, the smells were strong, I felt disaster coming on. There were stairs, that I dreaded, but he said " Oh no, come here." Like he knew what I was thinking. A little tiny, empty office. Hot and pungent, with a green velvet, worn seat on the floor.( I had to go to the bathroom, and I thought, I will never get up off the floor) ( The chair covers reminded me of the living room furniture we had when I was a toddler) His desk was a rusted metal piece of nothing, and a metal chair.One notepad on his table, and he wrote little, and took his sari off. Now this Indian man, in the loin cloth, was sweating bullets, and I did not care. He shined out of his skin, adorable, charming and said nothing. ( I thought this is costing me so much money, for nothing) ( But I didn't care) ( I knew, I was there for a reason)
He asked me about my children, I told him I had five. He looked sad, " You say that with such sadness." I felt terrible, is he reading something coming off of me, that I don't love my kids?? How can that be, he has not even looked at me. He turns around, and said, " You have to embrace sadness, you will be OK.", " You are scared of being sad." and then he laughed, so hard, with no restraint.
     I sort of looked around, then a little kid came out of the back, it was his son. The Dali Lama ( That is what I thought he must be) grabbed my hand, and took me to his kitchen behind his office, his family was there. We exchanged hello, and the doctor man, DL, was bragging about me, proud of me, for something, I did not know what? Then I thought, this is the best therapy I have ever had. I feel wonderful, the smells were delightful, the peace coming from just the everyday hustle of people, was contagious. The magic man, took me to the courtyard, to continue to introduce me to his colleagues.
   There were flowers and food, and linen tents. Breeze and sunshine, and this little man, taking me all around. He then told me, you do not need to see me again, I charge 534.00$$ an hour, and you are perfectly fine, wonderfully whole and sadness will come to you, but never stay.
   There were more steps to get out of this place, and then the door shut. I thought about how much more I wanted to say, or just be in this persons space. Yet I was content to leave, and did not pay my bill, no one asked me to.
           As I said, I woke up, as if, I had been to India, and talked with a holy man.
           Routinely descended our staircase and started telling Bill my dream, then I had to stop. Grabbed my book and started to write. Bill said, " What are you doing?" Me answering him, " I have to write it down, quickly, it could float away in a second, and I think this one was special." and " I did not lose my purse or search for a bathroom in this dream, and that is a miracle!" He laughed, he hears all my dreams. ( Although I did think about peeing in green chair in his office, I don't know why? It is a dream, you know)
      My lesson, who knows, for sure.......I feel like since I lost my Ward....I think that I just have no more sadness to come out of me.....like when sad things may happen....I will break open and never close up again...the holy man said...I would be fine...sadness will come....I guess that may be what I took from this dream. Also to be at peace, where ever you are, knowing, "You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one...there is comfort in numbers, we are in this together, all of us.