Unvarnished Conversation

I'm pretty sure most people do not wake up humming The Godfather theme music, yet today it was I. Either I dreamed of Michael, the early years, or I was going to have a "sleep with the fish" kind of day. Never a dull moment being me! So I proceeded with my day of lists, and picking off things that I did not feel urgent in my book. I started two loads of laundry, that will remain there awhile, and walked the dog. Had unvarnished conversation with myself, and explained to the worker men, that I was not talking to them!

It was too hard to explain that talking to myself is normal, so I said I had some form of Tourettes. Of course these nice men do not speak English, so I hope that in their native language Tourettes does not mean," Yes I will show you my breasts!!!" They are still painting, but now I think the young one is looking at me strangely??

Anyhow the day marches on, so I decide to deposit my first retirement check. I think I may be the only person that goes to the bank anymore, and I like to go to the real tellers. My children roll their eyes, when I ask if they would like to go with me, which fascinates me. Why don't they think this may be an adventure? Well, they are grown and not home, but I remember those eye rolling days, and what all they missed!! So I load up Lucy, the lab, and head to the bank. I have my deposit slip and check ready to go. Friendly hellos are exchanged, and my teller comes on the microphone and says, " Mrs. Baron you need to redo the deposit slip, you cannot write in pencil." I laugh out loud, and reply, " Honey that is not pencil, that is dove gray fine point sharpie!" She keeps looking at it, and asks, "Are you trying to trick me?" Hmmmm, "No, as I hold up my pen.........Fifty Shades, I smile." She looks confused, (I thought all women had read the books, clearly she is not one of them) " Do you want fifties?" continues the lady behind the glass. Now I'm about to wet my pants, and I scream, " You have no idea lady, but tens and twenties will be fine!"

I return to home, still humming Godfather music, and ask Lucy if she had a good time. She barks, happy and rolls in the grass, eats her snack and naps with no cares in the world. I look at her closely while she is sleeping because I see a faint smile, and I think she is having my Al Pachino dream!!!! No one ever said Life was fair, but unvarnished it is!!!!