My Mother's Friend

I recently had the priviledge of saying good-bye to Shirley. Mrs. Ivey died this morning, my mom's girlfriend.She knew that death was near, so she began to call all of her friends to say "Good-bye". We have known that Shirley was in a no-win battle with cancer. What a beast that cancer is, and pancreatic cancer, the devil himself.
I think it was Monday(by now, you know that days of the week escape me!!), Mom,Dad and I went over to see Shirley. As she lay in her bed, much like the baby Jesus in a manger,she reached for us. Her breath was shallow, but there was a clearity in her eyes. Mom sat next to her and held her friend, tight. Laying her head on Shirley's chest, both of them kissing each other. Dad and I were sitting at the end of the bed, watching mom. I have seen my mom grieve over the loss of her daughter and her first grandson, now her dear friend is trying to tell my mom, that its all ok. Of course there were no words spoken. The silence of love between friends, I felt like I was witnessing something beautiful. Then my turn to sit, a minute. Her skin, so bruised and thin. I held her hand and stroked her arm, and she said to me " Bonnie you are so beautiful" like she was looking at an angel. Next she softly said " Bonnie, I know how you feel" and she was thinking about my broken heart. You see she had lost a young son also. We were mothers connected in grief. In her last moments she was thinking about my heart. I thought that when she said I was beautiful, that maybe she was letting the medication do the talking, and then when she was talking about our boys, I knew, that she was totally aware of all things around her. I wish that I had told her, to look for my Ward, when she went to heaven, but I did not, somehow I think she was letting me know, that she would be doing some "mothering" real soon, with our boys. It was one of the most precious blessings, that I will always cherish, saying "good-bye" to Shirley and seeing her so near the new journey that she is now on.

Cotton picking, road trip!!!

Emma and I left yesterday, I think it was Saturday?? The holidays have me OFF!! in more ways then one. We decided to take a quick, road trip to Jacksonville, Florida. The drive is interstate , until Tifton, and we take back roads until we reach our destination. The home of my parents, Mary and Homer Blackman. The back roads are filled with character, so much so, that we were afraid to stop anywhere to go to the bathroom!!! These roads are straight out of "Deliverance", my hood. They did offer endless fields of cotton, that is so beautiful, and tweaks my interest. Often I have pulled off the side of the road, and had a "drive-by" photo op. Not this time, we kept moving. Then there are all the pe-CAN, not pe-kahn, trees lined up in perfect rows, demanding that we look with respect at their majesty. I love the moss hanging, so clear, on the empty trees. Massive quantities of road kill always adds to the flavor of the south, after a while, you don't even notice it. Which is sad, in a way?? I love the screen doors, with the big birds embossed on them, one day I will find one to drag back to "the burbs", they need some class.Clothes hanging on lines, Jesus is coming signs, nailed to a pine tree, another photo op. I always like know he is coming!!! Finally flat, Swampy, Florida land, and we arrive. Bugs and humidity and Christmas lights on everything that you can hang a light on!!! I do mean EVERYTHING!!! As always, this will be a short visit, but the writing material that I will gather is sooooooo worth the trip!!! Family is everything, wherever they hang their lights.

Can you use Avatar in a sentence??

Yesterday, or it could have been the day before??, the family went to see the movie AVATAR in 3D.
Over the river and through the holiday traffic we traveled. After the sticker shock ,ticket costs of twelve dollars a person, they lifted me to my feet and to my seat. Already Ebenezer Scrooge had entered my body, this needed to be a great movie. This beautiful film, by James Cameron, stole my heart. Every frame of digital strangeness, fascinated me. This was a live action film, and computer-generated effects. That means nothing to me, except that I don't believe that this entire film is done on a computer. BUT it is. There is really no Pandora? These Avatar people, are my people. I want to protect them. ( Hart reminded me, in the car, that it is just a movie!!!) Well, what does Avatar mean?? I need to know more. ( Let it go mom!!! you are reading too much into it!!!) Never....James Cameron wrote this story, I think it had something to do with Native Americans and how we took their land, and how we are destroying the earth.
I came home with research to do.
Av-a-tar-[av-uh-tahr]
1. Hindu mythology, the descent of a deity to the earth in an incarnate form or some manifest shape!! ( that is why they had tails!!) ( I think they were blue because of the ocean, opinion!!)
2.an embodiment or personification, as of a principle, attitude, or view of life.
3.Computer. a graphical image that represents a person, as on the Internet!!! ( don't like this one!!)

I think Pandora may be heaven, wonder why he called it Pandora?? Maybe because we never know whats in the box? So many questions? and I still cannot use Avatar in a sentence!!!

WANTED- Attention to Details!!!!

This Christmas, more than others, I've noticed that we Americans have lost the attention to details.
We have "gift-bagged" ourselves into being lazy wrappers of gifts. I lead the parade on this one, and I am not proud. The presentation of the gift is, as precious as, the contents. I have been known to not wrap, AT ALL!!!
What brought this realization to the front of my cluttered mind was, School Gifts!!!
My ELL (English Language Learners) kids may give , unusual gifts, like personal decorated EAR PICKS, but the wrapping is "old school'. Bows, ribbons, and cellophane! Dirt wrapped in cellophane, looks grand!!
This year I received Brazilian candy, homemade, in an individual wrapper , surrounded by cellophane and in its little, tiny box. Just one piece, in its own box with a handle. Beautiful. Then I gazed upon Santa's shirt and ribbon was the tie, that was the wrapping. It was folded and molded, origami wrapped ornament!!! None of us wanted to open the package. Awesome , attractive, presented with love, I felt it. There were homemade cookies, with labels telling us, the kind of cookies they were,petite little morsels, all wrapped and then wrapped again!!! Four little chocolate chips, four little peanut butter, four little nutmeg, all about the size of a perfect quarter, not touching each other!!!! Ribbon and design to die for, I kid you not!!! Homemade rose water soaps, in a gold foil box, just the size of the soap. I cannot even explain how the box opened and out came these little soaps, rose buds in my hands. No rubber gloves this year, or packages of panty hose, although those too were wrapped to perfection!!! A banner year, of sweetness, came our way.
Gifts bags are not horrible, there are so many cute ones to choose from. They certainly make gift wrapping easier, but I'm not so sure we don't lose something in the giving.
So this year I asked, Bill , Hart and Emma to wrap gifts, I can't take all this pressure!!!

Time is running out, December 17th!!!!

There is always too much to do, this time of year. Christmas is just toooooo close to Thanksgiving. Let's combine the two, Christgiving!!! I like it, serve delicious Turkey and fixings and put up the tree. WAIT, that's what we do now, there is no hope.
Right now, I'm up to my elbows in addressing Christmas cards.
Each year I begin to think about Christmas cards in August. What will my letter say? What tid-bit of knowledge do I need to share? What cute photo of my "grown" children will I send? How do I trick them into taking another Christmas photo??
This year they had a mini fit, I almost had to call a priest to cast out the demons in these babes of mine. Its a photo, for Christs sake. (Sorry priest!) "Mom we are too old!" cried my children. " Bah-Humbug, and stop twisting your neck around!!!" ( still possessed??) said I. So we decided to have a "healthy dialogue" which I believe is an oxymoron. Needless to say, the animals are on the card this year. They are ,after all, our sheep in the manger.Loving us up, with no fit in sight. ( I did sneak in a pic of the angels) You didn't think I would let the kids TOTALLY win, did you???
So the cards are all laid out, stamps, labels, printed card, photo of Hart and Emma, lists from last year, colored sharpies, three address books and no partridge in the pear tree!!! I have addressed about forty and have about fifty left to go, these cards are killing me. Crank up the carols, I need some Christmas spirit, or there is no telling How I may sign the remaining cards!! Oh Holy S--t.....I mean Night!!!!

Golf Clubs or Grits, your choice.

MEN, we do not go gentle into the night!!!
Tiger what were you thinking?? Better yet, Elin what were you thinking?? A nine iron, or hot grits!!! Take notes.

Today on the Internet, I read a news headline, A SCORNED WOMAN THROWS HOT GRITS ON HER HUSBAND WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING!!!!!!
lORD have mercy, that is an angry woman.
One-she took the time to make grits!
Two-She ate a bowl, before the big "splat"
Three-She added no butter!!!!!!so they would really stick to his lying, cheating, face!!! GAWD Almighty!!!!

Tiger,Tiger,Tiger, shame on you, and watch out, Miss Elin will receive a copy of this blog!!!

It takes a Village, to help me shop!!!

Another adventure with my buddy, Jamie. We decided yesterday, that we can only get together twice a year. We are too draining!!! or "Our Adventures" are!!
Saturday morning started with a tour of my Christmas decos,and the laughs began.I admit, I do have a certain "style", that my bud enjoys. From my angel bathroom decor, to my nutcracker ballet slippers surrounding a bowl of gold ornaments!!! These are signed slippers by the ballerinas, toe shoes, worn and beautiful. Yes I did buy them, one of my divine purchases.
From, la casa, we drove to "Farmer D's. An organic store, hooked to a Mexican car wash, that sells live chickens, and Kudzu baskets. We were shaking with laughter and excitement, we touched everything in the store. Baskets came home with us, crooked and marvelous. Next time we are going to have the car washed, while we hold the chickens, and shop!!!!
Our next stop was Ten Thousand Villages,(http://www.tenthousandvillages.com/). The five hundred nativity scenes stopped us at the door. It was a holiday delight, we really touched everything in that store, and had the sales boy!! show me how to make a prayer bowl sing. ( that sounds pornographic, but its a Buddhist prayer thing!!)
Merchandise made by people from all over the world,and the money going back to them.
I think they may have been able to build a house after we left, sooooo much fun.
Exhausted , we decided to stop by The Spruill House for the artist market show, just a quick run-by!!! We were grabbing homemade ornaments out of each others hands, and hollering. Precious jewels, to be had. All my purchases, that I bought for others, are hanging on my tree. I still have plenty to share??
Now we were beyond tired, but we needed some Java. Dunken Donuts was near and dear.
Little did we know that 35 minutes later we would still be sitting in DD's with "Boston Betty" who decided to share with us, her life story. We draw people to us, its a curse and a blessing. Jamie said it was because we had so much fun shopping, that we had to "pay back" and be good listeners.Honestly people, during the holidays, are a little different!!! It takes a village, of all kinds!!! Jamie and I included!!!! Merry,Merry!!!!

Stop Talking Aunt Lucille: Sing it loud, noel...NOEL!!!!!!!

Stop Talking Aunt Lucille: Sing it loud, noel...NOEL!!!!!!!

Sing it loud, noel...NOEL!!!!!!!

Growing up my dad would remind me, on occasion, that my singing sounded like, " A Fart in a Bucket!". What exactly does that mean?? My grandmother would say, "You have the voice of an angel!" I listened to "1-Nannie". She knew a gifted talent, a songbird!!!that's me. I belted tunes out morning, noon and night.
Singing fills my soul.
From Opera to Waylon, Diana Ross to Lady GaGa. Throw in Broadway show tunes,I become Fanny Brice.
So at this time of year,"Oh, Come All Ye Faithful", takes me to my knees. Christmas Carols added to my play list, a singer's dream.
Don't forget,a singer, I am!!!!! just ask my "1-Nannie"
So I sing, loud and proud, "Hark", this Angel Sings!!

Sand For All Seasons

While reading the , much anticipated, Sunday paper, an ad spoke to me. Jumped right off the page and called me by name!!!"Bonnie Kay Blackman Baron, why are you so bundled up?"I whispered,so my people would not think I was talking to the paper!!!So in a soft voice I replied, " I AM FREEZING MY ASS OFF!!"
I have never adapted to cold weather, in fact, not even cool weather. 75 degrees is sweater weather.
Build me a sign that reads "No Snow Allowed"
I know there are those that LOVE the snow, and cold. They are liars. People looked "pinched" in cold weather. Look at their faces, "PINCHED". Hats, and scarfs, and itchy clothes, bundled up and angry people.
Seeing the ad in the paper,inviting people to travel to Charleston for Christmas,confirmed my belief. It read "He's not frosty, but he sure is cool!"
A snowman made out of sand, YES!!! a sandman!!! Joy to the World!!!!

Are Your Lights All A glow?Or Is One Light Out!!!

Do not misread the title. I love "O Tannenbaum" It is the process of undoing the boxes, and checking the lights that can suck the "Ho, Ho, Ho out of you!!Each year I open the boxes and act, as if, I have never seen these things before. "Oh, look at this one!" I scream. My holiday ornaments have come home again. I hold them in my hands, like the wise men carrying the frankincense. Jewels, my family's memories, attached to each bauble.
Keith's macrame reindeer, Brian's inability to do crafts(no homemade ornaments), Ward's clay gingerbread man, Hart's felt bell, and Emma's paper star. That is just the first layer from four crates of "stuff" for the tree. The masterpiece of layered memories, adorns our computer room/living room. One of Lucy's many rooms to claim her own!! Lights blinking, and memories tugging on my heart. Christmas, I think, is for remembering, and always having an extra set of lights!!!!